3 cannabis-infused holiday recipes for family gatherings

Perhaps the reigning champ of holiday misery is the mandatory family gathering. What the occasion calls for is some cannabis to mellow out the entire situation.

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Christmas movies are a bunch of bull. All of them. 

The holiday season is less goodwill and cheer to all mankind and more anarchy, panic and frustration. December is basically an entire month of riding the line between pretending to be happy and having a full A Beautiful Mind-style breakdown. 

And perhaps the reigning champ of holiday misery is the mandatory family gathering. You know, the one where your grandpa stops everyone in their turkey-eating tracks when he says some shit that he doesn’t realize is supremely ignorant and definitely not OK in today’s political climate.

It’s the same meal where you’re likely to get into a debate with your uncle after he says something flagrantly stupid like, “Die Hard is absolutely a Christmas movie.” 

What the occasion calls for is some cannabis to mellow out the entire situation and help you enjoy the evening with your family. 

Now, we’re obviously not advocating that your dose your family unknowingly with THC. That’s not cool.

Sure, it’s potentially funny. It’s also potentially dangerous for a myriad of reasons.

In fact, event-planning pro Sam Kanter says there are several “rules” when it comes to serving edibles at your holiday dinner table — the first of which (and likely most important) is to make sure everyone knows what’s what before they dive in. (Clearly labelling anything infused with cannabis is always a good idea.)

Kanter also notes that chefs shouldn’t push any infused dishes on their guests or fellow guests. Let people know what’s there but “be respectful” if they decline.

As long as you follow the rules, edibles are definitely something you can incorporate into your next holiday party.

1) Guests arriving: Apple cider

Apple cider is a holiday classic and an obvious favourite for warming up on a cold winter’s day. 

It’s also a great idea to mellow everyone out immediately when they arrive, to try and stomp out as much initial tension and stress before everyone has a chance to get comfortable enough to tell someone off. 

What You’ll Need:

  • 4 cups of apple cider
  • 4 cinnamon sticks
  • ½ of a thinly sliced fresh apple (seeds removed)
  • 1/8 cup of brown sugar
  • ¼ teaspoon of whole cloves
  • 3 tablespoons of cannabis tincture (alcohol-based)
  • Crockpot (or slow cooker)
  • Elastic
  • Cheesecloth
  • Mixing bowl
  • Whisk

How to Make It:

  1. Pour the cups of apple cider into your slow cooker.
  2. Add cinnamon sticks, apple slices and cloves in the cooker with the apple cider.
  3. Pour the remaining spices into the middle of a sheet of cheesecloth.
  4. Use an elastic to wrap the spices — so that nothing can leak out.
  5. Drop your cheesecloth spice bag into the slow cooker and set it to medium heat.
  6. Once everything starts to boil, mix in the cannabis tincture and brown sugar together in a separate bowl, then add it to the slow cooker.
  7. Let cook for one hour.
  8. Remove the cheesecloth spices package from the slow cooker, gently squeeze out its precious juices before tossing it into the trash.
  9. Set the slow cooker to its lowest setting to keep your freshly made apple cider steaming hot. It’s now ready to serve.

2) During Dinner: Cannabis Gravy 

Ah gravy, the great unifier of both foods and people. 

Gravy is an easy one to bring to the table because it doesn’t interfere with any of the main dishes. Because it’s a condiment, you can control your serving a little more and be less-worried about over indulging and save the pigging out for the non-THC-infused food. 

What You’ll Need:

  • A large skillet
  • ½ cup cannabutter
  • Turkey, chicken, or vegetable stock
  • 2 onions, sliced thin
  • 2 tablespoons fresh rosemary, chopped
  • 2 tablespoons fresh sage, chopped
  • ⅓ cup flour
  • ½ cup balsamic vinegar
  • Salt and pepper to taste

How to Make It:

  1. Melt cannabutter in a skillet over medium-low heat. Be careful not to let the butter burn.
  2. Add onions and saute for 10 minutes.
  3. Add rosemary and sage. Saute for 10 more minutes.
  4. Add flour and whisk vigorously for one minute.
  5. Gradually whisk in enough stock until gravy thickens. Stir frequently.
  6. Add vinegar to gravy and let simmer on medium-low heat for 15 minutes. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

3) For Dessert: Snowball Cookies 

Your aunt won’t be able to shut up about how these are “the cutest things ever.”  But what will be really cute is when Aunt Carol gets high for the first time since college.  

A word of caution: These are going to be delicious, so don’t get carried away eating too many and don’t overdo it with the cannabutter. Keep the dose reasonable and don’t serve to anyone who is about to drive. 

What You’ll Need:

  • 1/2 cup unsalted butter
  • 1/2 cup cannabutter
  • 1/2 cup powdered sugar
  • 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
  • 2 1/4 cup all pourpose flour
  • 3/4 cup finely chopped nuts You can use walnuts, pecans or even almonds depending on how you want
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • Powdered sugar

How to Make It:

  1. Preheat your oven to 400°F.
  2. In a large bowl, mix up your cannabutter with the regular butter, the 1/2 cup of powdered sugar and vanilla extract. 
  3. Stir in the flour nuts and salt until a dough begins to form (everything  holds together).
  4. Shape the dough into small balls (insert dad joke here) and set them about one inch apart on an ungreased cookie sheet
  5. When your oven is ready, bake the cookies for 10 to 12 minutes or until they set. Don’t let them get browned, you only want them to set.
  6. Remove them from the cookie sheet and place them on a wire rack to let them cool enough so you can handle them.
  7. Roll the warm cookies in powdered sugar and set them back on the wire rack. For bonus points, let them cool off and then roll them in the powdered sugar once more time. They’ll look much more “snowball-y” after that. 

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